Taking The Proverbial - Botanical Support For Setting Healthy Boundaries
Taking The Proverbial
Botanical Support For Creating Healthy Boundaries
Waiting has been removed from humanhood. Everything is expected right now, delay of any kind is unacceptable. The pressure to complete work and tasks as soon as the need arises has caused people to become overworked and burned out.
As stress and burn out increases, boundaries decrease to the same degree. Stress and burn out have a domino effect. If one person becomes exhausted and unable to cope, they lean too heavily on a contemporary, colleague, family member or friend who in turn becomes exhausted and unable to cope. And so it continues.
The question arises, if you are being leaned on too heavily by another to support them as they circumnavigate a stressful situation which has left them feeling unable to cope, at what point do you put your safety mask on first and say no when you know that you too are beginning to seriously struggle under the burden?
We all have sympathy for those around us who through no fault of their own are going through a difficult life situation. That is not so much the issue.
The issue is more the people who actively place themselves in stressful situations they are unable to handle and simply expect you, by default, to pick up the pieces.
If someone has chosen to take on too many projects, too many sleepless nights because of the monetary gain or added prestige? If they have and continue to make self-destructive life choices? At what point do you say no to protect your own health and sanity?
And should it even come to that? Should you not be able to go back to your own family or community without burdening them with the stress of others that has by implication affected you and by extension is now effecting them?
At some point we all have to learn to say no and in the world we live in now, this has never been a greater need to do so.
If we do not learn to say no to being overly leaned upon or treated unfairly we need to learn to live with the difficult truth of our own martyrdom, that we may be actively contributing to, or at least actively accommodating, someone not treating us fairly or with due respect.
While this realisation can be deeply triggering, when someone consistently tells us how busy they are or tries to condone their poor behaviour and why we should pick up the pieces/slack for them, the bottom line can often simply be that they regard their time as far more precious than ours and it really is as simple as that.
For women, when you deviate from the “good woman” space, dependable, efficient, a great “right hand man” you had better be comfortable with being branded tough, difficult or unforgiving. It does not take much to fall into that arena when you start to say no, no matter how justified.
Water tends to find its own level and the reality is eventually you will have to say no. The question really is how much of your life and health are your prepared to sacrifice before that moment arises? The quicker you come to this realisation, the faster you can extricate yourself from a situation that is untenable.
A supportive tool kit for endeavouring to create and maintain healthy boundaries include the following oils:
- Atlas Cedarwood
- Silver Fir
- Yarrow
- Opoponax
- Sandalwood
- Holy Basil
- Palo Santo
Personal Power
- Atlas Cedarwood
- Silver Fir
Atlas Cedarwood helps us to find our power and strength. It fosters optimism and hope and helps to ground and anchor us.
Silver Fir can help us to discover our personal power. It supports us when we are trying to find a new direction in life. It helps us to find release from outworn patterns. Silver Fir can give us the courage to be ourselves.
Grounding
- Yarrow
- Opoponax
- Sandalwood
Yarrow protects us and helps to strengthen our energy. Yarrow also helps to stabilise our emotions.
Opoponax helps us to re-establish balance and harmony. Opoponax promotes clarity of thought and encourages us to follow our heart.
Sandalwood encourages us to listen and follow our heart. Sandalwood helps to quieten mental anguish and soothe mental chatter. Sandalwood grounds and stabilizes.
Clearing Negative Energy
- Holy Basil
- Palo Santo
Holy Basil helps to dissolve difficult relationships. Holy Basil helps to cut emotional ties that are negative.
Palo Santo is protective. It can help to clear toxic energy and act as a barrier when coping with toxic relationships.
For more botanical support click here